You Don’t Have to Wait Until You’re Exhausted to Rest

Something I see regularly in the treatment room is women who have become so accustomed to being constantly “on” that they don’t actually realise how much tension they are carrying. They come in, we chat, they tell me they’re fine, and then I notice the shoulders sitting high, the jaw clenching or how difficult it is for them to take a slow, deep breath. Then somewhere during the treatment comes that huge sigh, and it’s almost as though their whole body has finally been given permission to stop.

I find it fascinating how easily we can become accustomed to functioning this way. Life is busy and, for many women, there is always somebody or something needing their attention. Work, children, family, appointments, messages, housework and the never-ending mental list of things that need done. We become very good at getting on with it, often without noticing that slowing down has become something we only allow ourselves to do once everything else is finished. The problem is, everything else is never really finished.

Maybe it’s my mental health nursing background, or perhaps simply the conversations I now have with women every day, but I think we need to change the way we think about rest and nervous system regulation. It shouldn’t only become important when someone is already overwhelmed, exhausted or struggling to cope. We are generally much better at responding to our bodies once they are shouting than we are at listening when they first start whispering.

Nervous system regulation doesn’t have to mean adding another complicated wellness routine to your life either. In fact, I think that can sometimes defeat the purpose. If your attempt to relax involves another checklist of things you should be doing, it very quickly becomes another task to complete. Sometimes it is much simpler than that: sitting down long enough to actually finish your coffee while it is hot, going for a walk without tracking your steps, reading a book, having a bath, putting your phone away for half an hour or saying no to something when you genuinely don’t have the capacity for it.

This is also why nervous system health has become such an important part of the conversation at Sage & Blossom. I specialise in lymphatic health, but I don’t believe we can look at the lymphatic system completely in isolation from everything else happening within the body. How we breathe, how we move, our muscle activity, sleep, stress and everyday habits are all part of a much bigger picture. It’s one of the reasons my treatments have never really been about chasing the dramatic before-and-after photograph. I’m much more interested in what is happening underneath that and, importantly, how someone actually feels.

I often have clients who don’t realise just how difficult they find it to switch off until they experience what it feels like when they finally do. That doesn’t mean one treatment magically fixes a stressed nervous system, and I would never want to suggest that it does. What it can do is create a period where there is nowhere else to be, nothing that needs answered and nothing that needs achieved. For some women, even recognising the difference between constantly being “on” and genuinely feeling settled in their body can be incredibly valuable.

So perhaps this week, instead of waiting until you feel as though you desperately need a break, take one before you reach that point. Do something that serves absolutely no productive purpose and resist the urge to feel guilty about it.

You don’t need to earn rest, and you certainly don’t need to wait until your body forces you to take it.

Emma x

Sage & Blossom Holistic Wellness | Specialist lymphatic treatments and nervous system-focused wellness in Kirkintilloch, Glasgow